In 2013, Maria Bello penned an essay for The New York Times titled "Coming Out as a Modern Family." The actor detailed how a conversation with her son Jackson Blue McDermott, who was 12-years-old at the time, changed her outlook on love. The actor told her son about her relationship with her close friend, Clare Munn. "I didn't think of it as romantic or sexual," Bello wrote. "She was one of the most beautiful, charming, brilliant, and funny people I had ever met, but it didn't occur to me that we could perhaps choose to love each other romantically," Bello actor wrote.

This conversation helped Bello realize her feelings for Munn. "I had become involved with a woman who was my best friend," she recalled in the Times piece. This altered how Bello viewed romantic relationships. "I would like to consider myself a 'whatever,' ... Whomever I love, however I love them," she wrote. A couple of years later, she wrote a memoir about the experience, "Whatever...Love Is Love: Questioning the Labels We Give Ourselves."

Bello would define her sexual identity as "W" in the book, which stood for "Whatever." Her main focus was not defining herself but helping others embrace openness. "I felt like it was my responsibility to continue that conversation," she told the Advocate in 2015. "Give me any label you want to help advance human rights," Bell added. She would end up falling in love with another person who was passionate about women's rights.

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